If... by Finn McGarvey

If he were a month, he'd be December.
If he were a day of the week, he'd be Saturday.
If he were a time of day, he'd be "the time when friends come over."
If he were a planet, he'd be the sun - "not a planet, but a pretty big star."
If he were a sea animal, he'd be" a whale shark because they dont have any predators."
If he were a direction, he'd be North.
If he were a piece of furniture, he'd "NOT be a couch because everyone would sit and possibly fart on me."
If he were a historical figure, he'd be George Washington.
If he were a gemstone, he'd be a diamond.
If he were a tree, he'd be an oak.
If he were a tool, he'd "NOT be a hammer. Too much banging."
If he were a kind of weather, he'd be snowy (said with much enthusiasm.)
If he were a musical instrument, he'd "NOT be a drum because I would get whacked all the time."
If he were a color, he'd be red.
If he were an emotion, he'd be happy.
If he were a fruit, he'd be "none of the above." (note - he doesnt like many fruits or veggies)
If he were a sound, he'd be a loud bomb exploding.
If he were a car, he'd be a ferrari or SSC Ultimate Aero. (note - his mother has no idea what that last car is.)
If he were a food, he'd "none of the above." (note- apparently Finn is not into food much.)
If he were a place, he'd be Italy (said with much enthusiasm.)
If he were a body part, he'd "NOT be a leg or arm because they get in hurt a lot."

If he were a song, he "cant pick one because they're so many good songs out there."
Thats my boy!

Happy Saturday.