My dad passed away on Friday, September 2nd, 2011.
My sisters, mom and I were with him.
He slipped away from us peacefully and without pain.
I feel numb. I feel pain. I feel hurt. I feel lost.
I feel anger. I feel heavy. I feel alone. I feel dazed.
I want to rip out my hair.
I want to run until I collapse.
I want to check out and disappear.
I want to destroy something and break it down to nothing.
Its been three days and the void in my life feels massive and raw and unrepairable.
It feels like other things that were solid are starting to slip away into its abyss.
I want this to have never, ever happened.
This plan is unfair and cruel.
I want my dad back and there is nothing in this world that can make it so.
Oh Lisa I am so sorry for your devastating loss. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteLisa, I am so sorry for your loss. My dad died 11 years ago, when I was just 25 and he was 44. No matter the age, no matter the time, it is a heaetbreaking thing to experience. I am praying for peace, comfort, and healing for you and yoir family.
ReplyDeleteYou are in my thoughts Lisa...I know too well that there is nothing I can say, no wisdom I can share. I will keep you in my heart though...and hope that you can allow yourself every feeling, and every moment that you need to keep putting one foot in front of the other.
ReplyDeleteLisa...my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this incredibly difficult time. I'm so very sorry. :(
ReplyDeleteI'm really sorry Lisa. I can't even imagine how heartbreaking this is for you and your whole family. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
ReplyDeleteI know what you are going thru, Lisa. I also know that with the loving support you will have that you will be fine and we will be able to talk about all the great times with your Dad. This won't happen overnight but you will find peace knowing that he is a far better place. Love you lots!!
ReplyDeleteYour Dad was such a cool guy. I didn't know him well but always loved the stories and admired his spirit of adventure. When I tell people of him my favorite is his summer tour of baseball parks and when I saw this picture I can't help but think that is probably when he got that shirt. I know this is really hard for all of you and I can only hope that the many wonderful memories will help fill the void. You and your family are in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteoh Lisa....I'm so sorry for you pain you are dealing with the passing of your beloved Dad. I'm sending you hugs to comfort you.....
ReplyDeleteellie
Lisa, I am so so, sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my thoughts & prayers...
ReplyDeleteShelley
lisa, i am so, so sorry for your loss. i have no words that will make this better, but i will keep you and your entire family in my thoughts. sending lots of love to you today.
ReplyDeleteI am so very sorry for your loss and your pain. I don't have any words that are adequate. You have been on my mind all morning since I got the news. Your stories and pictures of your dad really touched me. Thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteLisa, I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I know the pain and frustration you are feeling. I remember when we had to make the decision to let my dad go; I felt as if someone should call the police or something, like it wasn't supposed to happen, and someone needed to do something about it, and fast! Silly, I know, but it is a feeling I'm sure you can understand. It just doesnt feel right and it won't for awhile. Eventually you will have a new normal and you will be able to cherish all the great memories of your dad. Especially with your kids. I will keep your mom and your family in my prayers. Take care you.
ReplyDeleteLisa, I’m finding no words of comfort or words to help take away your pain. I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your Dad. If there is anything I can do, please let me know.
ReplyDeleteSuzee
Lisa,
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for your loss. I'm sure your father was a wonderful man, I mean... Look how you turned out. :-) Times like these really test our character and determination. Sending you many, many, MANy hugs!
Cristina
I am so, so, so sorry for your loss. I'll keep your family in my thoughts and prayers.
ReplyDeleteTears come to my eyes now as I recall my own sorrow when my dad passed away earlier this year after a heart-breaking battle with brain cancer. During that time, I reflected on this quote often by Khalil Gibran, and I still reflect on it today... "When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight." It won't stop the tears, but it might turn your attention to all of the things about your dad that made him such a delight in your life and the lives of others. At least that's what this quote does for me. When I reflect on this quote I try and turn my tears' attention away from my sorrow to the delightful memories of my dad ...from the corny jokes he used to tell to his generous, selfless, humble ways...and I smile. xo Hugs from a stranger.
ReplyDelete