My nephew Elijah (I call him Blue) began kindergarten today. Finn and I went over to his house this morning to see him off. Blue was excited and cheerful and not at all afraid or tearful. He has the same wonderful teacher that Finn had in kindergarten. She is one of the best teachers I have ever known. I feel very confident he is going to have a fantastic year.
Watching my sister and Barry go through the first day of school milestone with Blue made me remember Finn and Seamus' kinder years. Seamus' was a little unusual. We pulled him from preschool after winter break because of some problems. Shea was spending a lot of time in timeout and I disagreed with how his teachers were disciplining him. There was no doubt his teachers had their work cut out for them. Shea was a handful, but he was incredibly bright too. My mom, who taught kindergarten for several years, suggested pushing him up to kindergarten. She thought he might be bored. After lots of coaxing I finally agreed and he was enrolled in Monte Vista Elementary School. Seamus cried like crazy on the first day. He wanted me to go with him and when I couldnt, he freaked out. I'll never forget it. Shea only had 1/2 year of kindergarten but what a huge year that was! Even though he struggled with behavior issues, he caught up academically very quickly.
Because Finn watched his brother go to school before him, his first year of kinder was far easier. He had no apprehensions; he was ready to go to school! I remember he wore a Star Wars t shirt on his first day with a plaid button up over it. He looked so adorable to me. After I dropped him off, I sat across from the playground (far out of his sight) and cried for a while. I called my mom in tears and she rebuked me for being such a sap. I couldnt help it though. I was so sad and scared to let him go. He did great though... just like Elijah.
Seeing Blue off today was such a different experience for me than it was with my own boys. I was super excited for Blue and I felt assured that he was going to be fine. He's is, after all, a smart, friendly kid. Why wouldnt he do great? However, with my own kids I feel much differently on the first day of school. I feel stressed with apprehension and fear. I typically dont sleep well the night before. I feel very insecure about how their day will go by without me. I worry a lot and I always cry (though not in front of them.) It literally takes me a few days before I start to let go. Its so ridiculous... I know. I can hear my mom now saying "Knock it off, Lisee." I know, Mom, but its hard for me. School has never been easy with my kids. The auntie gig is great because I can love my nephew like he's mine, but the anxiety that comes along with parenting isnt there. Today I really enjoyed the experience and I was excited for Blue to be start his academic life. I wish it were like that with Shea and Finner. Maybe this year, with some preparation on my part, it will be less stressful and more relaxed.
Thanks to Jen and Barry for letting Finn and I tag along.
Happy Monday!
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